How to find the best guy ever…. most of this is in satire.
I am actually writing this just for kicks (Because I like to be found on the Googles), so please don’t take this serious.
I am writing this for the ladies, so they can find someone like me, the best guy ever ;)
Here is the fluff:
1. The best guy doesn’t just sit around on the couch and talk about his glory days of football and women. The guy has to be a go getter, he has to have more goals in his life than just “make money” or “hustle” like most cheeseballs say they are doing. He has lots of energy to dedicate to the important things in life. This brings me to the next one…
2. Like the purple elephant in the room, a good guy really sticks out, has life goals and doesn’t slow down until he achieves them. He will basically NOT stop until he achieves these dreams.
They say, insane is doing the same thing over and over again and expecting different results, well he has to have positve results. Its cute to have dreams, but its the title “Best Guy Ever” you achieve as you surpass these goals. In order to not just be “on the grind” a good guy has to show results… His purpose is to succeed at his dreams and thats why…
3. A great guy doesn’t just talk… actions speak louder than words, this particular guy’s actions speak novels. Never judge him based on what he tells you. Have a little faith at first, but test that faith by seeing if he follows through and delivers. The best guys out there won’t just talk non sense. Their is a purpose when they speak… if they speak to much, that may be an issue and a red flag.
4. The best guy ever would be a good listener, he would memorize every word you say. When a person has to constantly remind you of WHY he is the best guy ever, then he is trying to cover up the real fact that he is not the person he is trying to show you (you see that?). An example is when someone has to say “I am not a liar”, because they are typically lying. When someone says “I am not unorganized, I am OCD.” They are over emphasizing what they are not; they are trying to sell you on something that they are not. The best guy ever would not over talk, he would listen, and he would not have to explain why he is the best guy ever.
5. The best guy ever will win over your whole family with out even saying a word. He will just look at them, and the family will approve. If you broke up with this guy, your family would disown you, just to keep him around. (True story)
A good guy doesn’t need finger guns and one liners to make the family love him. He would just be relaxed, calm, and discuss interest the family and he was interested in. The cool thing about being the best guy ever… is that everything you talk about, is interesting.
Now that you know some traits the best guys ever have, you may want to know HOW to FIND the best guy ever.
There are two options:
1. Google “Find the best guy ever”, date who ever Google recommends.
2. Read a series of qualifiers, that we will call ” 8 Qualifiers of the best guy ever ”
8 Qualifiers of the best guy ever:
1. You can not meet the best guy ever in a club, bar, or any other borderline adults only venue.
2. The best guy ever will have over 10 percents of your total friends on facebook or real life in common.
(easier to count on FB) for the slow people ( you have 1000 friends on FB, he should have at least 100 in common).
3. Your parents have to approve of him, and your siblings should actually be able to hang out with him WITHOUT your company, and they can even hang as friends.
4. Open the door for him, if is the best guy ever he will try to grab it from you. If so, he is a generous man and cares about you.
5. The best guy ever will not mind leaving the phone laying around on loud near you. (Better yet, really test him, swap phones for a day)
6. The best guy ever can make a suggestion for things to do, food to eat, or new drinks to try and blow you away. He would be able to analyze you and figure out what you would like. He would be more thoughtful and keen to your interests.
7. For you to be the best guy ever would try to do sweet nothings, cute notes, poetry, flowers, etc, because your on his mind and he likes to remind you. These come with time, not the second date, so be realistic :)
8. He would make an effort to contact you. The best guy ever doesn’t play the “wait 24 hours” game. He knows that good things are meant to last, but are hard to get, and quickly gone; so he acts fast.
Below is a good example of what the best guy ever would be for you ladies, watch the video :)